FUN COMPARISONS AND DESCRIPTIVES IN ENGLISH LANGUAGE...

Here is an interesting saying taken from a recent book. It is sort of a witty rejoinder that is NOT a compliment. More like a 'slap in the face'. A comment about a person's intelligence.


...he wasn’t able to string two words together without misspelling both of them.

Here are a couple more favorite "Southern" sayings (Similes, Metaphors, other allusions..)


"As welcome as an outhouse breeze"

"Dark as a sack of black cats"

"Brave as a bigamist"

Here are a couple more sayings that evoke a distinct image in the 'mind's eye'.


"The wrinkled visage looked older than Florida..."

"A smile as warm as a clear morning in January..."

Here is an interesting usage for a common phrase...

"I had met her.  A shit-stirrer. With a great big spoon."

From  Never Have I Ever   by Joshilyn Jackson

Here are a couple of sayings from a recent book. Could be called an adage possibly, or perhaps "proverb' would be closer to correct.


“In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king,” 

 From The Druid  by Jeff Wheeler



“It is more honorable to be raised to a throne than to be born to one. Fortune bestows the one, merit obtains the other.” 

From The Druid  by Jeff Wheeler

Here are some "Southern" sayings from my old notebooks of adages...


We’re closer than two roaches on a bacon bit.

You look like something the cat dragged in and the kittens didn’t want.

Smaller than a tick turd.  (THAT would be SMALL.!!)

Here are a few more sayings (idioms) that are more prevalent in the South...


As confused as a goat on astro-turf...


Grinning like a possum eating a sweet potato.


I’m just hanging out like a hair in a biscuit.


It’s quieter than a mouse peeing on cotton.

Here are some woodpecker comparisons --- Similes - Metaphors


As confused as a rubber nosed woodpecker in a petrified forest.  (as effective as..; As tired as... )


As silent as a woodpecker with a headache.


Harder than woodpecker lips..

I have a bunch more of these sayings; figures of speech; proverbs; adages; or whatever and however you want to refer to them... So, I guess I'll throw some more of them out there.


For the person wh was angry, riled up, and ready to fight..

**He was tail up and stinger out..


For someone DEEP in trouble, or jail, or..??

**He was so deep in trouble he would have to be fed beans with a slingshot..


Someone scared or anxious...

**He was squirming like a worm in hot ashes..


For someone who was spaced out or in daydreaming...

**You're so blind you would miss a crawdad playing cards with Ray Charles...


For someone who was hurt, hammered thumb, stubbed toe, banged head...

**He screamed like a mashed cat..


Where something was used up or eaten up or just plain missing...

**It was scarce as deviled eggs after a church picnic..

Here are a few more "adages" or "proverbs". These are not quite as well known .....


"He who would have the fruit, must first climb the tree."


"Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still."


"If you want the rainbow, you have to tolerate the rain."