JOKES, JOKES, AND MORE JOKES - HAVE SOME FUN.!!

An old man and his wife were sitting in a tavern talking quietly about their past. He quietly asks his wife if she remembers the first time they had sex. "Yes, she says. It was right here in back of this tavern. You held me up against that old fence back there and we did it there that first time." He nods and smiles. "You're right. I think we ought to head back there and do it again for old-time sakes. What do you think.?" She shook her head and said "I think you're being overly optimistic. But, it sounds like fun.!" The old man smiled and said as soon as they had finished their lunch they would sneak back there.

Now, unknown to them, a police officer in plain clothes was sitting quietly in the next booth. He decided to follow them and make sure they were safe. When the old couple got up and left the officer followed them quietly. Arriving at the back fence behind a trash dumpster, the old woman lifted up her dress and the old man dropped his pants. Whereupon they came together and all sorts of writhing, whining, and crying took place for quite a time. Soon, the couple gave out, collapsed to the ground and lay there catching their breath. The police officer, having watched the whole amazing thing, decided he had to speak to them. Maybe they would tell him their secret. It had to be worth knowing he decided.

in a few minutes, the couple struggled to their feet, rearranged their clothes and started to walk carefully back toward the street As they drew close to the officer, he stepped out and said, "That was amazing. You folks must have had an amazing sex life. I have to ask, What is your secret.?"
The old man, just now recovered enough to speak, said in a strange, garbled voice, "No secret. The last time we were here that wasn't an electric fence.!!"

Little Johnny was in a hurry for breakfast, he was extra hungry. So he asked his mom "What's for breakfast.. I'm hungry". His mom asked him if he had done his morning farm chores. Johnny admitted he hadn't done them yet, so his mom sent him out to do chores before breakfast. Johnny was upset so as he was gathering eggs he kicked one of the chickens. They when he was feeding the pigs he kicked one of them too. He finished up by feeding the milk cow and kicked her as he was leaving. When Johnny got back to the house his mom served him a bowl of corn flakes. Johnny complained because he saw the eggs cooking and smelled the bacon in the kitchen. "Why don't I get any eggs and bacon?" he asked. "And why is there no milk on my cereal?"  Well. his mom said,  "I saw you kick the chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week." "And then you kicked the pig, so no bacon for a week either." "And then on your way back, I saw you kick the poor old milk cow, so I guess you will have to eat your cereal dry." 

About this time Johnny's dad came down stairs and kicked the cat across the room. Little Johnny stood up from the table, looked his mom right in the eye and said to her....... "Well, are you going to tell him, or should I ??"